How much workers’ comp would Darth Vader get?

 

Right, I’m not a lawyer, but I’m going to have a damn good go at this!

Anakin Skywalker loses his right limb during the first battle of the Clone Wars. Now according to the law in the U.K, because the loss of his arm was above the elbow he could expect to receive £72,000 – £90,000 ($116,750 – $145,938). In addition the Jedi would also have to pay for his medical care; thus they would most likely pay for his new robot arm.

However, the above amount is for an average worker. A soldier would receive much more. Because this loss of limb was during a time of war the real problem is deciding if Skywalker was legally a soldier. Mace Windu earlier in Ep.2 quite clearly states that Jedi are ‘Keepers of the peace, not soldiers’. So it is safe to say that Anakin’s involvement in the Battle of Geonosis was not as a soldier, but something more akin to a private contractor.

Further damage that Anakin has taken during the war (such as the cut to his eye) would have gained him around £1,450 – £5,750 ($2,350 – $9,320). While that sounds quite high, it’s because there is a permanent scar that his compensation would be higher than normal.

Now finally Ep.3! Here he loses 2 legs and his one remaining good arm. (His robot arm was not cut off.) Below I have stated what he should get

Loss of hair: £1,125 – £7,250 ($1,823 – $11,750)

Facial scarring / disfigurement: £1,125 – £64,000 ($1,823 – $103,730)

Severe arm injury with permanent disability: £25,750 – £86,000 ($41,737 – $139,395)

Loss of both arms: £158,000 – £197,000 ($256,103 – $319,319)

Loss of both legs: £132,000 – £185,000 ($213,959 – $299,868)

Permanent disability to legs: £18,250 – £55,000 ($29,581 – $89,149)

Heart and/or lungs (we’ll assume that inhaling all that volcanic ash caused heavy damage to his lungs): £3,500 – £98,500 ($5673 – $159,659)

(As far as I can tell, his reproductive, digestive, and waste disposal systems should all still work and thus I have not included them in the final compensation payout.)

Finally we have to take into account the third degree burns that he has suffered. Literally 100% of his body has been burnt. I wasn’t able to find a relevant UK case study. However in the United States I found 2 victims who suffered from large scale burns and were awarded $2.5 million – $3 million (£1,542,461 – £1,850,953).

Assuming Anakin was paid the upper level for all his injuries then his final payout would be approx £2,639,453 ($4,278,686).

Of course this doesn’t even include the money for emotional distress. (After all, killing your own wife and children and getting cut down by your own mentor is pretty hardcore.) Add on another couple of hundred thousand and I think it’s safe to say that Anakin Skywalker would receive a cool $5 million.

The only issue is who would pay it. Anakin automatically kicked himself off the Jedi medical care list as soon as he started slaughtering the Jedi, so their insurance scheme wouldn’t cover him. Assuming that accepting the title of Darth Vader meant he was covered by Sith medical insurance, they would have to pay for his compensation and any medical care (basically they would pay for his black suit).

But then you have the added problem in that with the suit he is now able to work. Most compensation is given according to how well the victim can support himself. Since Vader has most of the movement that he possessed before his accident and furthermore goes across the galaxy kicking ass and taking names; the insurance company would have a very good legal case in getting their payments reduced by a judge.

 

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